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Online relationships
Online relationships have changed the world of dating. Today couples can "meet, date and fall in love" without ever having met. Welcome to the world of online relationships.
In recent years the Internet has become one of the most popular places for individuals to meet. Matchmaking web sites are among the most popular sites on the Internet. And new ones seem to spring up every day.
Four of the most popular Internet matchmaking sites are:
- Match.com (14 day free trial!)
- Yahoo personals on Yahoo.com
- The adults only sites - Passion.com and Eroticity.com
These sites have become popular because they are simple and inexpensive to join, easy to use, have a large, diverse clientele (increasing your chances for a match) and all four have developed secure screening systems that let you control the matchmaking process.
It wasn't long ago that the most people felt only desperate people, freaks, or neurotics would use the Internet to find someone. But busy single professionals with few opportunities to meet available people turned to the web as an alternative to the meat market environments. Now people of all ages, races and are fueling the boom.
To be sure, there are down sides to Internet matchmaking. Chief among them is the wide open nature of the web can lead to deception. And while reputable matchmaking web sites screen applicants, not everyone will have the same goals and motivations for going online as you. And it's easy to deceive someone that may be hundreds of miles away.
Many users are more interested in quantity (how many people can they get to respond to an ad) rather than getting sincere, quality responses and possibly building a relationship.
But if proper caution is taken, online relationships can be rewarding and long-term. Set some guidelines and stick to them. If someone is playing games or they're just not the person you're looking for there will probably be warning signs.
Give as little information as possible about yourself - phone number, address, where you work. But get as much information about the other person as possible. Sound unfair? It is, but better to be safe than sorry. Set limits about the information you'll share and if it's not respected think about ending the contact.
Be realistic about the other person. If they have too many dramatic, fantastic or exciting stories (he's rich, she's a model, he once dated Cindy Crawford, she had an affair with Mick Jagger), it could be a red flag. Most of us lead pretty ordinary lives.
Remember, no one is perfect and we all have similar day-to-day problems. But, if your contact seems to be too good to be true or is leading a perfect trouble-free existence - be wary.
Always be honest. You want your contact to be upfront. You need to be the same. Like all relationships, online matches only work when both parties are honest with each other. Eventually he/she will find out if they've been lied to. So save yourself a lot of embarrassment later by being honest from the start. Besides, you want him/her to like (or even fall in love with) you, not some made-up persona.
If you and your contact progress to the point where you want to take the relationship off-line, take safety precautions and use common sense. For your first meeting, get together for lunch or coffee in a public place. Let your friends know where you're going, who you're going to meet, how they can reach you and when you'll return. The person you're meeting face-to-face may not be the same person you've gotten to know online.
Take is slow. If the connection is real it will last. And if you're uncomfortable or concerned for any reason - leave. Remember, you have the ultimate power. Turn off your computer and walk away.
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