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Most
often, asking someone out on a date is often what
men and women dread the most. Then, a few hours
after you agree to go out with someone or someone
accepts your offer, you begin to wonder about
every aspect that could go wrong. What should
you wear? What do you talk about? Do you bring
flowers? Should you expect flowers? What should
you do if the night's conversation is lagging?
The
first date
These
questions are just a few of the many that are
pondered for hours, even days before a first date.
There are no definitive aspects of a first date
that have definitive answers. Every man and woman
is different. One woman may not like a man to
open a car door for her while another woman might
expect it. Do not worry about what the other person
expects. You do not know him or her and that is
why you are going out on a first date. Instead,
worry about what you are looking for in a man
or woman and how to best present yourself for
that type of person. One piece of advice that
comes from so many people is to be your self.
Unfortunately, many people are new to the dating
game and others have been away from it for so
long that it just seems so new that it becomes
very difficult. This single piece of advice will
carry you through any first date. BE YOURSELF!!
This overly used piece of advice is neglected
because it often does not work. Randomly choosing
a man and woman will generally not produce a lasting
relationship and thus two people try to "dress"
themselves to fit the wants of the other. Unless
someone can willingly change their personality
and lifestyle to meet the wants of another, the
only way to find a match is to BE YOURSELF. An
exception of this could be something along the
lines of being slightly more outgoing or conservative
based on your view of the situation during the
date. Many outgoing people are more conservative
on a first date because they don't want to scare
off their possible partner. The reverse is true
as well. Below are some suggestions for the first
date and a few dates thereafter.
Since men need more help than women, here are
some do's and dont's for dating:
Do's
and don't for men
DO:
o
Tell your date how beautiful she looks
o
Spend most of the night letting her do the talking
o
Ask about things that she seems to enjoy talking
about
o
Act like a gentleman. Open doors, say please and
thank you etc.
o
Show up 10 minutes early than you are expected
o
Do bring a rose or small bouquet
o
BE YOUR SELF
DON'T:
Ø
Speak about yourself or your business matters.
Only talk about yourself when asked
Ø
Talk about your family
Ø
Talk about previous relationships
Ø
Have more than a few drinks
Ø
Critique other men or women while you are out
Ø Speak of your financial situation
Ø
Be Late
Sex
and dating
"How
soon into this relationship should I have sex?
Is he or she expecting something that I am not?
What should I do if my date asks me to come upstairs
and I don't want to?" There is a multitude
of theory on exactly when to start having sex
in a relationship. Unfortunately, there is absolutely
no universal idea or theory that can ever hold
true for the majority of couples. With this in
mind you have two options:
1.
Go with the flow and enjoy the time you are spending
with your partner. Do not worry about when you
will begin to advance your relationship. When
two people are coming closer and closer together,
a sexual relationship WILL follow and worrying
about when will only cause unwanted stress. Overanalyzing
a relationship can often lead to the destruction
of the relationship itself. If you are eager to
advance your relationship then
2.
Be one hundred percent open and honest. Tell your
boyfriend/girlfriend your feelings about sex and
find out what he or she feels about the subject.
Maybe they have been more eager than you and have
been scared to bring the subject up. Be as respectful
as possible and get the idea across that being
together is what is most important to you. Don't
let the idea of sex seem like the strongest bond
in your relationship. The worst that can happen
is getting an answer along the lines of, "I
want to wait until the time is right." Before
you discuss this, make sure your partner knows
how important he or she is to you. THIS IS VERY
IMPORTANT!!
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